My Dear Friend

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question, "Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee."

Loosed Towel

Imagine you are outside playing with a baby (infant) with just a towel covering your body and as you throw the baby up, your towel looses grip while there are so many people around you...

Which one would you catch first, The BABY or the TOWEL?!

2 Mad Men

There were two guys locked in a lunatic asylum, and one night, they decided they didn't like that anymore and tried to escape.

They made it up to the roof. Just across this narrow gap, they see rooftops stretching across towns. The first guy jumps right across with no problem. But his friend couldn't jump because he was afraid of falling.

So the first guy said, "I have a flashlight with me, I will shine it across the gap between the buildings and you can walk across the beam and join me."

But the second guy said, "Do you think I'm stupid?! You will turn the flashlight off when I'm halfway across."

Why Are You Following Me

Yesterday, I went home late from an official function and I decided to use a motorcycle (Okada). On arriving home I alighted, paid the guy and left.

Breaking News: Rihanna is pregnant

CNN News: Rihanna is pregnant with Drakes baby.

"I've kept it a secret as long as I can. But I think the public have the right to know", said 29-year-old Rihanna.

Rihanna Mabaso of Mamelodi, Pretoria is pregnant with her long time boyfriends baby, Drake Nkosi of Durban, KZN. The pregnancy was confirmed this morning by her neighbour who spotted her in a taxi leaving the township with a bulging tummy.

Strong Girls

Some Girls have never seen the doors of a gym but look physically fit because of running from one man to another.

Village Virgin

A young man was ready for marriage but wanted a virgin, so he went to the village to get himself a bride. As soon as he got there,

Think again!

Change of Heart

A man is angry because he has it in his head that someone stole his wallet. He walks into a church to steal someone else's wallet, but he has a change of heart during the service.

Once a Day

A therapist has a theory that couples who make love once a day are the happiest. So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled, “How many people here make love once a day?” Half the people raise their hands, each of them grinning widely.

“Once a week?” A third of 
the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant.

“Once a month?” A few hands tepidly go up.

Then he asks, “OK, how about once a year?” One man in the back jumps up and down, jubilantly waving his hands. The therapist is shocked—this disproves his theory. “If you make love only once a year,” he asks, “why are you so happy?”

The man yells, “Today’s the day!”

Beautiful Dream

Beautiful Dream "It was a Saturday morning and Akpos said to his wife, "Today I had a dream about a beautiful woman.''

His wife replied, ''Oh! Was it me?''

Akpos said, ''No, it was not you, it was someone else''

The wife said, 'Ok... I'm sure she came alone.''

Akpos replied, ''Yea she did, how did you know that?''

She said, "Because I was with her husband, he came in my dreams too alone."

Husband Pet Names

Nigerian women and how they address their husbands with pet names.

When he gives her N500,000 upward: She calls him Sweetheart.

When he gives her N400,000: She calls him Sweety.

When he gives her N300,000: She calls him Honey.

When he gives her N200,000: She calls him Dear.

When he gives her N100,000: She calls him by their first child name... e.g Daddy Junior.

When he gives her N50,000: She calls him Mr. John.

When he gives her N25,000: She calls him Mr man.

When he gives her N5,000: She calls him by name; e.g Johnny.

When he gives her N500: She calls him This man.

When he gives her lower than N500: She calls him with a sound... e.g "wooosi", "phuuuuu", "hissssss".

Terrible accident

 Terrible accident

An accident occurred today. 11 persons were injured and 12 died. So the Minister of Health promised to offer N5,000 to the injured and N6million to the dead for their funeral. All of the sudden, one of the injured got up and moved towards where the dead people were. Immediately, one of the dead people […]

Akpos’ mobile money advice for all men in 2017

Akpos has an advice for all African men in 2017.It is as follows:

The moment you ask a girl “WHAT’S WRONG?”
And she replies “Hmmm”

Guys, dont ask “why hmm …?”

Its a Mobile Money Trap!